The “Bandit Gang” was spotted in Southridge on Friday evening while the Sizemore Family was out celebrating the couple’s wedding anniversary. For the first time ever we have an eyewitness to the crime, unfortunately we only have their statement. The bystander requested to be put into the “Witness Relocation Program” that has been successful for many ex-Southridgians. (You know who you are)
The witness was disturbed Friday night by the sound of a loud sports car driving through the neighborhood and went outside to observe where the noise was coming from. The scene he saw was truly disturbing to say the least. The Bandit & his crew of misfits had taped a sign onto the garage that at first glance looked like well wishes for the couple on their anniversary. The eyewitness then noticed the vulgar display hanging from the sign and tree in the front yard. The gang then strung Christmas lights and Saran wrapped the family car. At one point the Bandit Gang was so captivated by their work on the car, one of the gang’s members was temporarily wrapped into the car. As a last touch the gang strung up a rainbow flag on the family’s flag pole.
Our bystander thought everything was over, but was mistaken. The Bandit then instructed his team to another house. The Bandit Gang strung more lights, threw lawn furniture about the yard, then found a “For Sale” sign which was planted in front of the residence.
The witness also took photos which have been enhanced to protect the suspects since they have yet to be questioned. As you can see the gang had plenty of time to carry out their mission and used every minute of that time to devastate private property. We also now have clear pictures of the get-away car. It is a 1978 black Pontiac Trans Am with a gold eagle painted on the hood. Surveillance photos have confirmed the vehicle being in Southridge on several occasions when Bandit sightings were made. Please report any and all information as soon as possible.
On a brighter note the annual Lions Club Wild Game dinner was Saturday night. Most Southridgians attended and had a blast. The board has voted and decided to make this an annual event for Southridge. We were the loudest and rowdiest table there, imagine that. I also learned that the guys in Southridge have some mean dance moves. I counted like 5 different styles of “the sprinkler” and 6 or 7 styles of what I would call “the chicken.” You go guys!
Hope everyone has a fabulous week. Watch out for the Bandit; never know when or where he will show up.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Wow! what a great time Saturday! Didn't want it to end.... Hey, isn't it ironic that the Bandit has the same hat as Tim had on Saturday??? Maybe the Bandit is trying to throw us off! What a sceaming sleazer!!!
That Bandit is a tricky one. We must follow all leads. Where was Tim's hat purchased?
Post a Comment